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grift shop

at the presidential library

“Pardons For Sale”

Did you, or someone you love, engage in criminal acts in the past four years? No worries, we’ve all been there. Whether it’s making false statements to federal investigators like Michael Flynn or obstruction and witness tampering like Roger Stone, the fear of federal prosecution is fairly universal in modern American society.


Since President Trump is discussing giving away pardons like “Christmas gifts”, why shouldn’t you get in the act and pardon those close to you?


This (in no way legally binding and/or effective) Grant of Clemency makes a wonderful stocking stuffer for that felon in your life. Give them the (completely false) peace of mind that they are protected by the (satirical, anti-library of the) President.


Write in:

  • name of recipient
  • conviction check box
  • day / month / year


For sale, on a pay what you wish format.

Download and pay whatever you feel the pardon is worth.


“In a closed society where everybody’s guilty, the only crime is getting caught. In a world of thieves, the only final sin is stupidity.”

― Hunter S. Thompson




Download PDF and print. If framed, makes a lovely keepsake!

Tue ‒ Sun: 10am ‒ 08pm
Mon: closed

Adults (Citizens): $25
Adults (Seniors): $10
Adults (Immigrants): $50
Children & Students: free

1 MAGA Lane
Nogales, AZ 85621